It's Electric

Tinted vans, rusty nails and most social situations. These are some of the fears that I've inherited. The fear that resonates most with me is a fear of all things electric. When taking a bath for the first twenty years of my life, I kept a close on the hair dryer and curling iron sure that they wanted me dead.
Electric means toasters, lightening, plugs and wires but also things like fireworks. Another fear that is closely linked with the electric concern is the fear of losing an eye. I believe the origin of this fear is my fathers poor eyesight. He often speaks about how he would have died had he lived in ancient times due to his near blindness. The idea is that he would have been left for dead in a cave while superior sighted humans left to discover the wheel or that he would not be able to see through a dense forest while tigers chased him.

In modern times, my father exchanged tigers for toaster plugs and 4th of July sparklers and combined that with exploding eyeball phobia. Still, when I was young neighborhood teens like fat Louie and the evil drug dealer David Parrish (oh the horror, he was from a single parent home, another fear) gathered on the street right in front of our house and lit an impressive 4th of July show on Glenbrook Ave. We watched from over 100 feet away as my father wrapped his hands tightly around our wrists. All it took, he said, was one faulty M80 and when Louie bent over to light it, that M80 would rip through his eye socket. Louie would be blinded immediately. No need to call an ambulance. The show's over. Happy Fourth of July!